I have a confession to make. I'm the mom who always perpetually runs in at the last minute. And if I turn up on time and have breath to spare, it's because I had the time wrong, and got there early. Like today. I arrived half an hour early for one of Anna's activities because I had it wrong on my calendar. "At least I didn't show up later," I said.
I am the mom that forgets things like bake sales, school luncheons, getting the charity fundraiser cookie dough sold and in on time. I forget it's picture day. And to send in field trip forms. Forms are a terrible one for me. I get them and if I don't fill them out right away, well, I totally forget about them. I once forgot to sign Emily up for Soccer and by time I did, it was too late. She was left on a waiting list the whole season.
I have tried to combat my enemy, the clock (and the calendar), by setting alerts on my phone for every single appointment even if it is an appointment that occurs each and every week. And still, I have more than once forgotten to pick a kid up from school... ok not so much forgotten, but I run out the door five minutes after the bell has rung. Often. And there was that one Wednesday that they got out of school early, and I forgot my kids and other peoples kids.
But I cling to the phone alert because most of the time it works. Unless it is in my handbag. And my handbag is in the kitchen while I am in the studio, and I have music playing loudly so the alert on the computer was useless.
For instance, this evening, I was caught up in here, and realized at 7:10 that I was supposed to be at a summer school parent orientation at 7:00. I raced down there only to find that it was over. And, by the way, twisted my ankle running in. There were some uber-organized super moms hanging around who gave me the low down... get here at 8:30, bring a snack... the whole drill. This, I have to say ticked me off to no end. You had me come rushing my rear down here to tell me the same thing you said in the darned letter you sent me? I missed dinner. Hmmpf. This is why I miss these meetings, I told myself.
All of this makes me feel incredibly guilty. So, I try to tell myself what I do get right.
Little absolutely necessary things: I do always make sure my kids have the clothing they need, are taken to the doctor for their yearly appointments, have their teeth cleaned every six months. I make a mostly healthy dinner most nights.
Household things: Although I might have a little time management issue, I can organize stuff. I usually know where the forms are, I just don't actually remember to fill them out. I keep things relatively clean.
Things we do together: I hang out with them, we cook, we get our nails done. I craft with them. We listen to music and watch movies. I don't forget birthdays, and always make a fun party. You maybe remember the story about taking them to see Wicked? That was a good mom thing.
Things to boost their confidence: I tell them how wonderful they are, and I tell them when I think they could do better. I ask them how their day was, and I always hug them and smile when I see them. I tuck them in every night. I sing to wake them up... which they hate ... and I find endlessly amusing. But I bet they remember it, and sing their kids awake too.
I tell them to stand up to bullies. And, ... and I do insist that we eat together as a family. No TV. No cell phones.
I love them to pieces.
So there are a few late forms, missed appointments and a whole lot of rushing around. But mostly I get it right. And that, is what counts.